MONEY PLAYOFFS – ROUND 2 RECAP
$600 on the line. Feelings hurt. Dreams crushed.

This was the round where legacies mattered, nerves showed, and one coach once again reminded us that regular-season success means absolutely nothing when the bracket turns red.

Jobu Needs a Refill (178.56) def. Romulan Warbirds (150.08)
Coach Dennis showed up swinging, but Coach Rich brought a flamethrower. Jaylen Warren ran like he was late for rent, Chris Olave committed multiple fantasy crimes against humanity, and Hurts calmly handled business like a man who’s been here before. Bijan did everything he could for Coach Dennis, but you can’t beat a voodoo god who’s fully stocked on rum.

Coach Rich: “Same ritual. Same results.”

Coach Dennis exits with dignity. Jobu moves on looking dangerous.

CRUSHERS (171.76) def. Steel Curtain (102.80)
And there it is. The annual postseason collapse.

Coach Jeff entered the playoffs with hope. He left with Josh Allen scoring under seven points and his season evaporating in real time. Meanwhile, Coach Chuck rolled out his Bengals stack once again: Burrow, Chase Brown, and a full Cincinnati demolition crew. This was less a matchup and more a public execution.

Steel Curtain once again proves that December football is not their month.

Coach Chuck: “Defense wins championships. Burrow wins money.”

Coach Chuck advances and officially begins his title defense tour.

PLAYOFF STORYLINES WE CAN’T IGNORE

Steel Curtain has now perfected the art of peaking in November and disappearing when it matters most.
CRUSHERS looks locked in and terrifying, clearly intent on reminding everyone who won it all last year.
This week officially belongs to Coach Rich, as Jobu Needs a Refill punches its first ticket to the championship game after years of chaos, near misses, and rum-related disappointment. The gods have finally smiled.

SURVIVORS MOVING ON
Jobu Needs a Refill
CRUSHERS

Everyone else? Start scouting mock drafts.

Next up: the finals are looming, the checks are imaginary but the pride is real, and Chuck is absolutely not here to be polite. If history tells us anything, someone’s getting rich and someone’s getting roasted forever.